How to Write Dramione Fanfiction
by virtual horror story
Summary: Have you ever wanted hundreds of reviews? Do you ship Draco/Hermione? Do you want to WRITE your own Dramione fiction? It may seem like a daunting task at first, but after decades of research, I've devised the perfect formula to write successful Draco/Hermione fics. Read more to ensure your success as a writer in this genre!


**How to Write Dramione Fanfiction**

Dramione fan fiction is (quite obviously) fanfiction in which the primary focus of the story is romance between Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger. There are approximately fifty thousand such fics on this website alone (49,838, to be exact). Why Dramione, you ask? Simple! It has all the elements of a star-crossed romance. You have Hermione Granger: a goody-two-shoes that's brilliant and beautiful, contrasted with Draco Malfoy, who's arrogant, absurdly handsome, and most importantly, Hermione's enemy. They hate each other. _Hate, hate, hate._ So naturally, you _have_ to ship them.

Once you ship them, the next logical step is to set sail and begin writing your own Dramione fanfiction. It may seem like a daunting task at first, but after decades of research, I've devised the perfect formula to write successful Draco/Hermione fics. Read more to ensure your success as a writer in this genre.

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**Table of Contents**

_o1. The Plot_

_o2. Sub-plots _

_o3. Characterization_

_o4. Writing the Story _

_o5. Publishing the Story_

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**Step 1: the Plot**

This part doesn't even matter that much because most author's know that the most important part of Dramione fics are the angst-ridden snogging sessions that Draco and Hermione have. The plot is secondary. In fact, you can skip to the next section if you'd like. If, however, you choose to have a plot, continue reading. Coming up with one isn't very hard. You could always turn it into a Twilight/HP crossover if you're down on ideas. If that's not appealing, and you still can't think of a general idea for your story, you're in luck! I'm more than willing to share a few with you below.

**_"Ron as the villain" _**This occurs when the "Golden Trio" returns to Hogwarts to complete their 7th this fic, Ron is a slimy git that cheats on Hermione with Lavender Brown or some other slutty blonde. (It doesn't really matter who she is because you don't plan on developing her character at all. In fact, she only makes one or two appearances in the entire story, during which you repeatedly describe her as a blonde, a bitch, and a slut.) Hermione finds out and is devastated. (Be sure to use the word_ devastated._) She runs far, far, away (probably to the closest abandoned classroom, because she actually can't run very far in the high-heels you've described her as wearing—but more on that later).

Lo and behold! Draco Malfoy stumbles into the very same abandoned classroom and sees our beautiful heroine crumpled into a ball on the floor, crying. You don't have to explain Draco's presence in the classroom. He probably just needed some alone time, or something. In any case, one thing leads to another, and soon they're snogging up against the wall. (You're only allowed to use the word snog. _Kiss_ is forbidden.)

_**"Marriage Troubles"** _This takes place after they've graduated, and Hermione is married to Ron. Their marriage isn't working out. Maybe Ron's spending too much time at work, or maybe they've just grown apart—or maybe, Ron is cheating on Hermione?! (See above.) After a particularly angsty argument late at night, Hermione goes for a long, meandering walk and ruminates on the state of her life.

_What happened to all my dreams?_ she wonders. She is 23 (so old!) and has put her career on hold to be a full-time housewife for Ron, because she thought she loved him._ How did I end up so unhappy? Is Ron really my soulmate? _After she thinks about these truly thought-provoking questions for a while, she realizes that she can't face Ron right that moment. Instead of returning to the Burrow, she apparates to the local bar and gets hammered. Then, she sleeps with a mysterious stranger (don't worry! she's drunk! she's still the innocent, beautiful, heroine that she's supposed to be!). In the morning, she wakes up in bed with Draco Malfoy.

Some really cool plot twist ideas for this story involve: Ron apologizing and telling Hermione that she's the love of her life. Hermione gets back together with him, but realizes that she's pregnant with Draco's baby. Alternatively, you can skip the back story (as shoddy as it is) and just write a quick fic about Hermione getting drunk, sleeping with Draco, pretending it didn't happen, and then realizing she's pregnant with the next Malfoy heir. ...And then, unexpectedly, falling in love with him! Nobody—and I mean _nobody_—will see it coming!

_**"Hermione comforts Draco"** _This can take place during their 6th year when Draco is emotionally traumatized, and therefore, incredibly attractive. Hermione probably accidentally runs into him crying his eyes out in the bathroom, or bumming around the Astronomy Tower. In this fic, Hermione is a compassionate, beautiful soul whose only purpose is to mend Draco. At first, Draco won't let her in, but soon enough, he begins to realize that...that maybe Granger is right. Despite the fact that the whole reason that he's emotionally traumatized is that he's attempting to assist the Dark Lord, and despises mudbloods, he'll begin to fall in love with Hermione.

This story should involve a lot of unnecessary sex, because Hermione, being the kind soul that she is, will probably sleep with Draco multiple times as a way to cheer him up. This story could also take place long after the final battle when Draco is tragically suffering from PTSD as a result of being an asshole that sided with Voldemort during the Second Wizarding War. (Remember: no matter how awfully Draco treats the people around him, he's still obscenely good looking. And in the end, that's all that really matters.)

_**"Hermione the pure-blooded princess"** _Hermione had no idea that she was Blaise Zabini's twin until recently! They are a medical marvel: one white, and one black, and twins! Now she knows that she's pureblood royalty. And Draco is a veela. They're soul-bonded. I think you get the idea.

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**Step 2: Sub-plots**

Obviously, the ones above aren't the only possibilities. There are other unique ideas out there. For example, Blause Zabini could've made a bet with Draco that he'd get "that hot mudblood girl" to sleep with Draco within a month. That's an interesting idea for a fic. Or (and this one's really clever!) Draco and Hermione could be Head Boy and Head Girl and be forced to live with each other. Say what?! Anyway, as you can see, plots in Dramione fics really only exist to justify the romance that occurs in them. If you skip straight to the romance though, you don't even need a plot. Hopefully your readers won't notice (or care).

Instead of an actual storyline, your entire fic could be made up of sub-plots with random snogging sessions between Draco and Hermione interspersed throughout. The only way to maintain your reader's attention is to continually throw up new obstacles between the two star-crossed lovers. That's what sub-plots are for. They're like stories within the story. Here are some pretty rad ideas:

_**"Ginny/Blaise"** _Ginny and Blaise make a wonderful couple for a multitude of reasons. The first is that they can offset the angsty romance going on between Draco and Hermione in your fic. Blaise and Ginny make a dynamic couple! Ginny is fiery (she has red hair) and witty and funny and gorgeous, and Blaise is sexy and rich. (Also, feel free to conveniently ignore the fact that Blaise is depicted as being black in the movies. I'm not sure why, but a lot of writers seem to think this is a pretty good idea, so why not.)

Blaise/Ginny involves a lot lighthearted bickering between the two in the background. A really cool aspect of this pairing is that once they're together, they can conspire to get Hermione and Draco to start dating as well! In a fic like this, Ginny and Hermione are best friends (as opposed to Harry, Hermione and Ron being best friends. Ew. Who would write a story about that?)

_**"Narcissa vs. Hermione"**_ This is a cool sub-plot that can keep your story going even after you've beaten its premise to death and written more than 50 poorly spelled chapters. Once Draco and Hermione get married, and Hermione sacrifices her autonomy to become the perfect wife and moves into the Malfoy Manor, she finds that most of pureblood society hates her because she's a muggleborn.

This sub-plot shows how Draco and Hermione heroically deal with this new strain upon their marriage and stick with another through thick and thin, even though Hermione's mother-in-law wishes she were dead. In the end, Narcissa will tearfully embrace Hermione Jean Malfoy and affectionately refer to her as "the daughter I never had." This sub-plot is guaranteed to move your reader to tears.

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**Characterization & Character Development**

This section is fairly straight-forward (and short). I've made it easy for you. This is how it works: for each character below, pick one adjective from group one, and another adjective from group two. I'll explain the rest once you've completed this exercise.

_**Hermione. Group one:** _shy, nerdy, innocent, smart, lonely, confused. _**Group two:** _popular, famous, hot, really popular, really hot, foxy.

_**Draco. Group one:**_ arrogant, afraid, confused, scared, lonely, misunderstood. _**Group two:**_ a changed man, married, kind, generous, friendly.

Fantastic! What you now have is each character's starting point and ending point. All you need to do is write a story that explains how Hermione and Draco went from being adjective 1 to adjective 2. (The answer is clear. This transformation occurred because they fell in love.) You don't have to worry about the characterization or development of any of the other characters. They can basically stay the same throughout the fic since they aren't main characters and only exist to further the romance between Draco and Hermione.

**Tips to keep in mind for Hermione:**

Hermione doesn't have to be smart. Nobody really wants to read about a smart girl. Or, if you do make Hermione smart, then make sure she isn't smart by the end of the story. That could be her character development! For example, Hermione is a shy, bookish nerd that is always focused on school, but has a secret crush on resident heartthrob Draco Malfoy, and so she undergoes a transformation to get his attention.

This involves dying her hair blonde (and straightening it), wearing makeup, short skirts, and high-heels, and magically growing boobs overnight. She also stops being smart, because smart girls aren't attractive. (At least, not in this story. In this story, Hermione doesn't actually speak. She giggles. Eg._ "Hi, what's up?"_ _Hermione asked_, would actually be, _"Hi, what's up?" Hermione giggled."_)

**Tips to keep in mind for Draco:**

There are certain key adjectives that you should make sure to describe Draco as. These include (but aren't limited to) tortured, arrogant, smug, and royalty. Be sure to refer to his hair as "sleek" and "blonde" as often as you can.

Also, if Draco has been physically and mentally abused as a child, he becomes a far more complex and dynamic character. You don't even have to explain how these experiences impacted him. You can just make him be an indiscriminate asshole (with a secret soft side), and attribute his assholery to the fact that he was abused as a kid instead of actually developing his character.

**Other characters:**

Ron should probably be a complete idiot. This way, the reader understands why Hermione is leaving him for Draco. He mistreats Hermione, and is constantly "gawking" and "gaping" and just generally being very confused. He's an awkward ginger kid, after all (unlike Ginny, who is a fiery, hot-tempered red-head).

Harry should mostly be off to the side, making guest appearances in your fic to shake his head sadly whenever Ron says something particularly stupid, and being supportive of Hermione. Or, if you want to switch things up, you can make him side with Ron and never, ever, talk to Hermione again. He, much like Ron, doesn't understand the new Hermione, but unlike Ron, isn't attracted to her. (By the time Hermione's makeover is complete, she should be completely drool-worthy. Every boy at Hogwarts ogles her as she tosses her long blonde locks over her shoulder. Except Harry. He's probably gay.)

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**Writing the Story **

Now that you've got all your notes for what the plot will be, how the characters will act, et cetera, do you very best to ignore all of that information. You don't need it. A true writer writes from the heart. A true writer is spontaneous. A true writer doesn't need to read a guide, or get tips from anyone. You don't need a plot, character development, or grammar. What you have is much, much better: a vague, hazy idea of a story that you maybe kind of want to write, sort of.

Sit down at your keyboard, and write whatever comes to you. Don't bother to edit it (you have to leave your writing in its truest form). This is the shortest section of this guide, because this is something that you can't be taught. This is a spiritual process that you must discover for yourself. Good luck, comrade.

_P.S. Maybe include some smut?_

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**Publishing the Story**

You've done it! You've written the epic first chapter of a Dramione fic! Congratulations. Write a lengthy author's note in which you inform your readers that you will try to update daily to keep them satisfied. Then, backtrack and threaten them by saying that if they don't review, you won't post more chapters. There you go. Now your first chapter is complete. All that's left is to pick a title and write your summary. Here are some title ideas:

_**Dramione**_

_**Dramione: A story**_

_**The 8th Year**_

_**Opposites Attract**_

_**I Love You!: A dramione storys**_

Feel free to come up with one on your own, if you'd like. Now you have to write your summary. This is an extremely tricky process. No one really understands how to do it. Supposedly, you're expected to write a quick blurb about your story, but how are you supposed to even know what your story's about? It's artwork! It's up for interpretation. Your story has a life and a will of its own, and you can't hope to capture its essence in so few words. Thankfully, here are some key phrases that might help.

**Keywords & phrases for your summary:** _"unexpected romance" "git" "budding romance" "crying" "comfort" "they hated each other!" "what happens when...?" "i suck summarys pleas review!" "first story ever!"_

CONGRATULATIONS AGAIN. HIT SUBMIT. YOUR STORY IS COMPLETE. I couldn't be more proud. Sit back and watch as you receive an unbelievable amount of reviews. You deserve it.

**THE END.**


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